Viranga Perera

Postdoc at the Johns Hopkins University Applied Physics Lab

Your Royal Minus

Will cross that line hundred yards at a time
Instill all of my feelings on this rhyme

Understand this is my way of coping
Stand in line? Why? Can’t partake in voting

Dream crushed you say? Nah, here is the yorker
Seam at his legs that discarded joker

Notably tackling this confederate
Totally done being considerate

Feedback for you in the form of a diss
Track these words carefully so you don’t miss

That I am a goddamn force of nature
Doormat, you’re just a pathetic creature

Get this broken orange pekoe some tea
Bet this boaster doesn’t have a rupee

Excuse me kindly your royal minus
Bemuse me later, relax your sinus

Better ask your caddie for some tissues
Hater, you got serious daddy issues

Daddy really could not buy you any class?
Laddie, is that why you are so damn crass?

Short of love? By orders of magnitude
Support your need for constant gratitude

Only a magazine to stroke ego?
Holy! That too far? Wonderful, BINGO!

Wife is keep going to shoo you away
Strife! She will leave you, I have seen this play

Blight House has another new opening?
Right. No, not volunteering, just stating.

Amen! Grab that pussycat on your head
When you wake up by yourself in your bed

Putting on that old 80s tuxedo
Ignoring people of Puerto Rico

Hold another rally, create a mob
Told you are desperate for a fan job

Ribs on your gold plate we believe are prime
Ad libs your way to another hate crime

World-class disaster, much like Chernobyl
Gas you spew can’t hold flame, far from noble

Commander-in-grief, speaker of nothing
Slander is not noticing you bluffing

Sir, next time you spread hate on Fox News live
Answer to life, universe ain’t 45

Civil War: Part 2? Being a hero?
Snivel for a repeat. Score? Two-zero.

Tweet, carry on all that senseless yapping
Browbeat! Life you have, so embarrassing

Last you learnt something? Your adolescence.
Vast, the number of critical lessons

Core math you know? Written on a pencil
For psych disorders, you are the stencil

Being in eternal truth denial
Aging, moldy potato you’re senile

Taxes don’t pay, but talk up privilege
Masses of Joes barely hanging on edge

Bore through another bucket of sherbet
More nominations? Another pervert!

Strive hard to make sure yet more kids are jailed
Contrive not, your fine legacy is nailed

Brought the GOP quickly to its knees
Sort only welcomes Gropers Only Please

Coup that occurred is extremely murky
Who invited this virus? The party?

Foresee no need for reporter Tintin
We know you’d do anything for Putin

Remarry now three-ways with him and Kim
Dowry you give them will be rather slim

Task before trying to ascend the throne
Ask Pomfrey to fast grow your first backbone

Think you’re a king? Not even a spare pawn
Sink yourself with lies, time’s up on this con

Simply you’re divergence of a B-field
Clearly, rest of your time you should just yield

Unfit, you can’t jump a 2-inch hurdle
Admit you would lose to a dead turtle

Know what most of us would really prefer
Throw this rodent on a Hohmann transfer

Remember you are in the micro-scale
November will be in the Richter scale